1. So you might’ve thought we’ve been slipping the past couple months with no new posts but we swear there’s a good fucking reason for the radio silence. We’ve been working our asses off on the book and now you can finally preorder your copy through Amazon, Barnes & Noble, IndieBound, or Books-A-Million.

    We know y’all have been patient and we really appreciate that shit. We’ve poured everything we can into this damn book and it’s taking some time to get that shit right. We didn’t want some half-ass book that looks like we just printed off a bunch of stuff from the site. Naw, we know you deserve better than that. So this book hits hard with 100 brand new, tasty as fuck recipes that are guaranteed to elevate your kitchen game.

    Stay tuned for more updates, behind the scenes shit, and all kinds of previews as we get closer to unleashing this beast of a book.

    The Thug Kitchen Cookbook is coming for you October 2014.

    Expect that shit.

     

  2. Asparagus is a solid stand-alone veggie with all its vitamin K and folate but paired with this creamy risotto? HOT DAMN. It takes this spring staple to another level.

    SPRING ASPARAGUS RISOTTO

    Enough for 4 people

    2 tablespoons olive oil

    1/3 cup chopped shallots or yellow onion

    3 cloves garlic, minced

    1 cup Arborio rice*

    ½ cup white wine

    ¼ teaspoon salt

    4 ½ cups vegetable broth

    1 bunch asparagus, about 1 pound

    ½ teaspoon lemon zest

    1 teaspoon olive oil

    ¼ cup minced chives

    pepper to taste

    Warm up the veggie broth in a medium pot until it gently simmers then turn off the heat. Chop up the shallots, garlic, and asparagus. You’ll want the asparagus in pieces about an inch long, like bite-sized. Cut off the tough ends because those woody sons of bitches will ruin everything.

    In a large skillet or pot with a wide bottom, heat up the 2 tablespoons of oil over a medium heat. Add the shallots and sauté them around until they start to look kinda golden, about 2-3 minutes. Add the garlic and rice and sauté until the rice smells toasted and starts looking like it absorbed some of the oil, about 2 more minutes. This helps make your risotto all creamy SO DON’T SKIP THIS SHIT. Add the white wine and salt to the pot and cook until most of the wine has evaporated and you scraped whatever bits of shallot got stuck to the bottom of the pot, like a minute or 2. Drink the rest wine because… well, that shits already open. Might as well.

    Now add 2 cups of the warm broth, stir, and lower the heat so that the pot is at a simmer, uncovered. Stir every couple of minutes until most of the broth has absorbed into the rice, about 7-10 minutes. You don’t need to stand there and stir it the whole fucking time; whoever started that rumor about cooking risotto is a goddamn liar. Just stir it every minute or two while you clean up or troll the internet. Add another 2 cups of warm broth at this point, and do that whole stir and simmer thing again for another 7 minutes or until the rice tastes slightly undercooked and there’s still broth in the pot. Now dump in the asparagus and cook until it’s tender and the rice looks like its sitting in a creamy gravy, about 5 more minutes. If it starts looking a little dry before everything is tender, just add some more of the broth a tablespoon at a time to fix that shit.

    When the rice and asparagus taste on point, turn off the heat; add the lemon zest, remaining oil, half the chives, and a little pepper. Taste and add more salt, pepper, or whateverthefuck you want. Serve right away and top with the remaining chives.

     

    * This kind of rice is starchy as hell, so it will make your risotto the extra creamy and delicious. If you can’t find it don’t worry about it, just grab a short grain rice.

     

  3. Looking for that perfect grocery bag? Not anymore.

    Check out Thug Kitchen’s new merch store. You’re fucking welcome.

     

  4. Today marks the beginning of the Lunar New Year, so what the hell are you cooking up? Grubbing on long noodles is believed to add longevity to your life and you’re going to need the extra luck to offset whatever dumbass plans you have with fireworks later. The fennel and ginger in here do fucking wonders for your digestion, there’s no celebration required to work those into your diet. So this year take control of your plate and leave the fireworks to the pros.

    WINTER VEGETABLE STIR FRY

    8 ounces of noodles (udon, somen, soba, spaghetti, rice noodles, whateverthefuck you want but the longer the better)

    1 ½ teaspoon neutral tasting oil  (like grapeseed, peanut, sesame, something flavorless. DO NOT grab TOASTED sesame oil, that’s different shit)

    1 large bulb of fennel

    2 medium carrots

    1 large bunch of kale

    1 ½ tablespoons of minced ginger

    4-5 cloves of garlic

    1 tablespoon soy sauce or tamari

    1 tablespoon seasoned rice vinegar

    1 tablespoon water

    1 ½ teaspoons orange juice

    1 teaspoon chili paste or Asian style hot sauce (optional)

    1 cup sliced green onions

    Cook the noodles according the package directions, rinse them under cool water, and set them aside. Slice up the fennel and carrots into thin matchsticks about an inch long. Remove the stem from the kale and slice it up into thin strips about the length and width of your finger. Mince up that garlic and ginger too since you’re already chopping shit up.

    In a large wok or skillet warm the oil over a medium-high heat. Add the fennel and carrots and stir fry until the vegetables begin to soften and char in some spots, about 4 minutes. Stir frequently. While that’s going down, mix together the tamari, vinegar, water, oj, and chili paste in a small glass.

    When the veggies in the wok are ready add the ginger, garlic, and kale. Mix those motherfuckers up and cook for another 30 seconds. Rinse the noodles again, shake off some of the excess water, and then add them to the wok. Turn down the heat to medium. Toss the noodles together with the vegetables and add the sauce. Cook for another 30 seconds just so the noodles get warm and the sauce gets cooked in. If it starts to look a little dry, calm the fuck down and add another tablespoon or two of water. Turn off the heat, fold in the green onions, and taste that shit. Add more vinegar, hot sauce, or a splash of tamari if you want. I don’t really give a shit how you customize your flavor. Serve hot and topped some more green onions.

    Serves 4 as a side

     

  5. It’s below freezing and you’ve been walking through people’s goddamn cough clouds all day. At this point, soup is fucking inevitable but don’t grab some condensed crap. Your body needs some vitamins, not a shitload of sodium. Roast up this bad motherfucker and elevate your soup game.

    ROASTED TOMATO SOUP

    1 28 ounce can of plain, peeled whole tomatoes (get one that is low on sodium, check that motherfucking label)

    3 teaspoons of olive oil

    4-5 cloves of garlic (still in their skin)

    1 medium russet potato

    1/2 a small head of cauliflower (about 1/3 pounds)

    1/2 a medium yellow onion

    1 tablespoon of diced fresh rosemary (if you need to use dried, use only 1 teaspoon)

    3/4 teaspoon dried thyme

    2 1/2-3 cups vegetable broth

    salt and pepper to taste

    Warm up your oven to 325 degrees and grab a rimmed baking sheet or big ass roasting pan. Pour 1 of the teaspoons of oil on the baking sheet and smear it around evenly to make sure nothing is going to fucking stick. Drain the tomatoes but save the juice in a separate glass, we’ll use that shit in a little bit. Slice the tomatoes in half lengthwise and place them cut side up on the baking sheet. Try to keep about 1/3 of the sheet empty for future veggies. Roll the cloves of garlic in the oil on the pan, and place them near the tomatoes. We want to leave the skin on the garlic so those little bastards roast and get all sweet. Add a small pinch of salt over the tomatoes and roast all that in the oven for 30 minutes. If you can’t remember to check the clock, set a timer. If you can’t do either then why the fuck are you in the kitchen with sharp objects?

    While the tomatoes are roasting, skin the potato and chop it, the cauliflower, and onion up into dime-sized pieces. You want to end up with around 1 cup of chopped potato, 1 1/4 cup chopped cauliflower, and 1 cup chopped onion. Toss them all together in a bowl with the remaining oil, rosemary, thyme, and a small pinch of salt and pepper. After the tomatoes have roasted for 30 minutes, add the seasoned vegetable mixture to the pan, spread it out as much as possible, and roast all that shit for another 30-40 minutes. You just want to make sure the potato and cauliflower are tender and a little golden in some spots. Take the pan out of the oven and let it cool for a couple minutes. Squeeze the garlic out of its skin; it should pop right out and smell fucking dope. Add the rest of the shit from the baking sheet and the roasted garlic to a blender and pour in the broth. Run it on high until the soup looks smooth. Pour all that into a pot on the stove, warm it over a low heat, and add the remaining tomato juice you saved from the can (it should be around 1/2 a cup). If you want a thinner soup, add the extra half cup of broth but I like it thick. Taste and add more salt, pepper, or herbs to get it right for you. Serve hot with some bread so you can mop your bowl clean when your spoon becomes fucking useless.

    Makes enough for 4 mugs or 2 regular bowls

     

  6. Hoppin’ John is not only a staple recipe for good fortune every New Year but it’s also a pretty solid fucking meal. Let’s put the superstitious shit aside for just a goddamn minute and appreciate the nutritional value of this savory son of a bitch. There’s enough protein and fiber in here to help you start the year off right. EAT BETTER. FEEL BETTER. FUCK LUCK.

    HOPPIN’ JOHN

    1 ½ cups dried black-eyed peas

    2 teaspoons olive oil

    1 yellow onion

    2 bell peppers (I used red and green but use whateverthefuck you like)

    3 ribs of celery

    2-3 chipotle peppers in adobo sauce (these smoked peppers come packed in sauce and are sold in a tiny can at most stores near the salsa and beans. Trust me, it’s there, just fucking look.)

    2-3 cloves of garlic

    1 teaspoon dried thyme

    ½ teaspoon dried oregano

    ½ teaspoon paprika

    ¼ teaspoon ground black pepper

    2 bay leaves

    ¼ teaspoon salt

    3 cups of vegetable broth

    Rinse the black-eyed peas and throw out any grit or fucked up looking peas. Put the peas in a medium container and cover them with a couple inches of water. Let them soak overnight or for at least 6 hours. After they have soaked, drain the peas and start fucking cooking.

    Chop up the onion, bell peppers, and celery. In a large pot, warm up the olive oil over a medium heat. Add the onion and saute that shit until it starts to brown in some places, about 5 minutes. Add the bell peppers and celery and cook until they get a little soft, about 3 minutes. Take the chipotle peppers out of the can, cut them open and scrape out the seeds. These little bastards can be spicy, so taking out the seeds helps you keep that heat wherever the fuck you like it. If you prefer it hot then keep some of the seeds in. Keep all of the seeds if you want, I really don’t give a fuck. Chop up the chipotles and dice up the garlic real fine. Add both to the pot and stir all that shit up. Add the thyme, oregano, paprika, black pepper, bay leaves, and salt and cook for 30 seconds. Toss in the drained black-eyed peas and the broth and bring that shit to a simmer.

    Let it simmer uncovered until the peas are tender. This can take anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour depending on how long you soaked your peas and how old they are. If you start running out of broth before those are ready, add a little more broth or water. If the peas are tender and you’ve still got too much broth in there, just drain some of that shit off. Not a big fucking deal. Just check the seasoning when you are all done and add more herbs or spices if you think it needs it.

    Serve this seasonal standard over your favorite kind of rice, topped with some green onions, and with a side out sauteed greens for extra luck or some superstitious shit like that. I used long brown rice and some kale for greens but whateverthefuck you got is fine. You can even use a vinegar based hot sauce (like Tabasco) on that shit and take it to another level.  

    Serves 4